PARTISAN REVIEW
407
night I heard Melanie saying to my sister Michelle, "Everyone hates
me because I'm white." Michelle's very sensible. She's my favorite
sister. She
just
said, "Melanie, you've got to stop that." And that's
the last I ever heard of it. Except once when my Grandmother,
who's pretty old-fashioned, wouldn't let Melanie stay over. And
Melanie glared at her and said, "It's because I'm white, isn't it?"
My grandmother didn't deny it and I felt pretty weak.
When Sonny came today I didn't have much to say to
him.
He said that Ma's in the hospital because she's so upset she swelled
up all over. Then he told me that Dad forgave Francine and let
her come back in the house and go visit Ma. But Dad
still
won't
visit me, Sonny says.
There were all these pauses as I didn't have much to say.
There's not many people I can talk with, who really understand
me anymore. Just my Doctor and Melanie and of course Michelle.
So then Sonny left and I said "Keep the Faith, Brother," and he
gave me a soul handshake.
I've taught Melanie
all
the soul handshakes and a lot of other
things besides. There's a lot she didn't know -like
if
you're a girl
you never leave your man's side when you're at a party. And under
no circumstances do you start talking with some other cat unless
I'm talking to
him
first. At first she made a lot of mistakes and
_ was really embarrassed. People said like I wasn't really her man
and she was just using me until something better came along. Then
after that they'd start in on how any black man who's proud of
his
Origin wouldn't hang around with white trash. But I really yelled at
Melanie when we got home after the party, and now she doesn't
make so many mistakes. But she hardly ever goes to parties anymore,
which makes me mad, because I like to have her by my side when
I'm talking to someone.
May the ninth
Melanie didn't come again today. I had a long talk with the
Doctor about it. He couldn't understand why I'd really care about
her. He always calls white people "fey." This
is
the slang of
his
generation for "foe" - which is what the White Man
is.
I told the Doctor how I always felt that my personal relation–
ships
and private life should have nothing to do with my politics.
The Doctor asked me how I met Melanie. I told
him
how
