ROBIN MAGOWAN
it 's very dangerous for you to come near me-that 's the
truth-don 't, please.
the last point of irony is thank you for the box of things.
i open myself to whatever spirits may come from it. also thank
you for everything.
can you dig that
my
damnation is your blessing?
love
239
But of course between friends nothing is ever terminated . There
was the metamorphosis by the orange juice stand still
to
come . And
there were the drugs that always shadowed , conditioned , her
existence . Something was about to explode , but what , when, where:
dear robin-hello-hi hi hi
friday, February 9
Finally after one year i feel like i have the privilege to write
to you. I don 't want to keep living in this world without seeing
or hearing your poems sometimes . . . i feel like that 's too
much
after about
7
weeks of the fall quarter i was just
finished-spent
a
couple of hundred on cocaine, went
through an acting routine
&
took an incomplete, and the
fellowship at the lab ends in
a
few weeks . It is not without
its myriad associations of particular kind of madness in which
many of us at the lab live .
things with Gilbert in our expensive ass flat went from
worse to worse. i tried every kind of old routine to make him
leave until finally got the guts to leave myself. did on the first
of the new moon this january, renting
a
room with refrigerator,
sink
&
hot plate in oakland by the lake.
i've learned to play chess this year past-for real.
i was
a
mad invalid-frequently-from november till
january.
oh
my
newest goal is to travel to Brazil, which is why i'm
still hanging around-to save money. and
my
most rare
fortune recently has been to purchase
a
several months
supply of hash oil.
i feel very out front
&
for real now that i've walked out
on Gilbert. course i've been trying it one way or another for
years. but shit this time at least is very direct-like i didn't say
i was going away on business or nothing-i just said i'm
leaving.
hey-i went to the women 's international tennis matches.
but who is the woman you are living with? did i ever meet
