New Year, New Growth

A History of Coming Out and National Coming Out Day

by David Simon

New Year’s Day can have a different meaning from person to person. For some, the transition to a new year has little impact on their daily lives; for others, the new year can represent an intentional overhaul in lifestyle. Like the beginning of a new year, “coming out” can represent a new start for those whose true selves have been in hiding, or it can simply be a small step in their life’s journey. 

The fluidity of language, combined with growing societal acceptance of diversity within gender and sexual identity, has allowed queer-aligned people to reclaim the coming out process from its archaic original definition of “[self-]recognition…as a homosexual.”i This grants “closeted” folks the agency to come out who may hold additional identities within the LGBTQIA+ umbrella: from diversity in gender such as transgender, nonbinary, and agender people; to sexual identities such as bisexual, asexual, and pansexual people. Anyone within the umbrella can “come out” as they see fit. 

In an interview with the Washington Post, non-binary artist Alok Vaid-Menon discussed the benefits of coming out as well as the bonds queer folk form within their coming out stories. 

“You don’t actually have to tell everyone,” Alok Vaid-Menon said to the Post.ii “You can just find people in your life that you feel comfortable with, and create those kind of safe spaces to actually strategize about what the next steps are for you.” 

“Coming out” can be challenging even if public figures and popular media make the process seem easy.  The mixed metaphor of “coming out of the closet” is reflective of the history of queer identity. Queer identity was once considered by society to be a “skeleton in the closet”—as if showcasing one’s identity in public was something that merited shame.iii In present times, growing public acceptance,iv combined with a heightened societal understanding of how identity is formed, has resulted in “coming out” being a process that prompts celebration rather than shame. 

The Beginnings and Future of National Coming Out Day 

The roots of National Coming Out Day stem from the 1987 National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights.v The cause of the march, according to sociologist and professor Amin Ghaziani, arose from two issues: the lack of a meaningful government response to the AIDS epidemic and the 1986 Supreme Court case Bowers v. Hardwick upholding anti-sodomy laws that targeted gay men as constitutional.vi In addition to the protest being a response to government hostility toward LGBTQIA+ people, the march also debuted the NAMES Project AIDS Memorial Quilt, which is considered to be the largest community arts project in history.vii 

The march itself has remained influential to this day. From the formation of National Coming Out Day to commemorate the protest to the rise of several ACT UP branches in the march’s wake,viii momentum had built up to secure equality for LGBTQIA+ individuals within United States law. 

For all of the progress that has been made until now, these advances would not be possible without people coming out. Their coming out often meant that their identities were under public scrutiny. Many who came out or who spoke out against homophobia, and other forms of discrimination, were silenced by both indifference towards prejudiceix and hostility from individuals, organizations, legislators, and the courts. National Coming Out Day is as much of a celebration of those who are currently out as it is of the trailblazers in LGBTQIA+ history who have made being out a possibility. 

Coming Out Is a Personal Experience 

“Coming out” is a personal decision guided by one’s own experiences – a person is a member of the LGBTQIA+ community regardless of whether or not they choose to disclose their identity. For instance, if someone is in a position where “coming out” puts them in harm’s way, then that person should not feel compelled to publicly discuss or share their identity. There are many reasons why somebody may feel uncomfortable revealing a personal aspect of who they are, and that is more than okay, as we all have a right to privacy. 

“You’re part of a long-standing and sacred legacy of queer and trans people who have felt the same pain as you,” Vaid-Menon said in the aforementioned interview. “So while you might feel alone, remember that we’re actually lonely together, and there are people who are going to see you in your entirety.” 

Works Cited

  1. Burgess, E. W. “The sociologic theory of psychosexual behavior.” (1949). p. 141.
  2. Upadhye, Neeti. “How Artist Alok Vaid-Menon Lives beyond the Gender Binary.” The Washington Post, WP Company, 20 July 2022,
    https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2022/07/18/alok-vaid-menon-nonbinary-artist/.
  3. Procter. (2017). Coming Out of the Closet. In We Did What?!: Offensive and Inappropriate Behavior in American History (pp. 94–96).
  4. Gallup. “LGBT Rights.” Gallup.com, Gallup, 13 July 2022,
    https://news.gallup.com/poll/1651/gay-lesbian-rights.aspx.
  5. Stewart, Chuck. Documents of the LGBT Movement. ABC-CLIO, 2018. p. 111-112
  6. Ghaziani, Amin. The Dividends of Dissent How Conflict and Culture Work in Lesbian and Gay Marches on Washington. University of Chicago Press, 2008. p. 86-7.
  7. “The History of the Quilt.” National AIDS Memorial,
    https://www.aidsmemorial.org/quilt-history.
  8. Stein, Marc. “Memories of the 1987 March on Washington.” Outhistory.org, Aug. 2013,
    https://outhistory.org/exhibits/show/march-on-washington/exhibit/by-marc-stein.
  9. Lopez, German. “The Reagan Administration’s Unbelievable Response to the HIV/AIDS Epidemic.” Vox, Vox, 1 Dec. 2015,
    https://www.vox.com/2015/12/1/9828348/ronald-reagan-hiv-aids.