490
JOYCE CAROL OATES
not convinced that anything ever happened to me. I don't remem–
ber.
If
Peter exists then I exist, but only when he's in the same
room with me. He's gone most of the time. I wait for him and
when he returns I come alive again. There is nothing that anyone
else can say to me.
(a sudden gesture of anger, embarrassment)
Oh, that stupid thing! That movie projector of yours! You were
always embarrassing
~s,
taking pictures all the time - birthdays,
Christmas, Easter Sunday, graduation! - how I hated that, being
herded around and made to smile, to look pretty, you with your
camera trying to put us all on film!
FATHER : You wanted me to take pictures of you -
SHELLEY: I did not!
FATHER: And you loved to watch the movies we made - the whole
family loved them!
SHELLEY: I was lying to you.
FATHER: What do you mean? You weren't lying.... Now your voice
is so strange.... It's as if someone else were speaking for you.
SHELLEY
waves him away.
FATHER: Who is this man, Shelley? What did he do to you?
PETER
(courteously):
I have already introduced myself. ...
SHELLEY
(to her father):
To you I lied, I was a lie myself -
my
body was rotten with lies. To him I tell the truth. I tell Peter
everything.
FATHER: Who is he?
SHELLEY: A man who saved my life!
PETER
(to
FATHER): Why don't you open up your suitcase? I'm
anxious to see what you have. Is it an expensive outfit? I'm think–
ing of getting a movie camera myself, but I'm careful about buying
things, I go slowly, I consider a purchase like that quite an invest–
ment. I think I'd wait for sales in January.
SHELLEY
(her hands to her face):
I don't want to look at anything
he has. Nothing of his. Nothing he has to show me.
FATHER
(opening the suitcase, moving slowly and apologetically):
Shelley, please ... I put together a few things to show you....
You don't have to do anything. I won't force you to do anything.
SHELLEY: I won't look!
PETER
(examining the projector):
This looks like a good piece of
equipment. Where did you get it?
SHELLEY: Make him leave! There's nothing of my life I want to
look at - it's finished-
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