PARTISAN REVIEW
489
FATHER
(rubbing his eyes, very confused):
What are you talking
about ...?
I
can't understand you ....
PETER: You understand me well enough!
FATHER:
I
haven't slept for two days.... I've been calling home to
see if Shelley is back yet, but every time
I
call it's the same, nothing
ever changes.... Your mother says you died and you should be
forgotten. But I can't forget.
PETER
(cheerfully):
You're telling us lies! You're making
all
this up!
FATHER: Once I saw a girl on the street, in Toledo, and I ran after
her thinking it was you....
PETER: What's in that suitcase?
FATHER:
A
projector–
PETER: What?
FATHER:
A
projector-for slides and films–
PETER: Home movies?
FATHER: Let me explain. Please. You are always interrupting me–
PETER: But we're listening, we're fascinated!
FATHER: I put together some things to show her-if I found her–
I
wanted to explain myself to her-
PETER: Explain what?
FATHER:
I
want to be logical and objective.
I
don't want to force
her to do anything.
PETER: What have you got, home movies?
FATHER: Some slides made from snapshots.
A
few things.
I
put it
together before
I
left home ... a few things to show her.... There
is something
I
must prove to her.
SHELLEY
(violently)
:
He
saved my life, not you! Peter saved my life!
FATHER: Shelley. . . .
SHELLEY: He made me into the dark side of the world. Most of
the world is water. I bet you didn't know that! You can sink in it
forever, that dark water, it's always moving, pulsating, ebbing,
flowing, streaming, draining away, flowing back, flooding, rising,
crashing.... Try to stop it! You can't! He made me into that
water, he made me the dark side of the world, he saved my life
by kissing me, it was a kiss that lasted for hours, for days.... He
breathed into my mouth, he breathed himself into me.
FATHER: You're not well. You're-
SHELLEY:
I
can't hear you. I'm not even listening. I'm not your
daughter or anyone's daughter.
I
don't remember anything.
I
am
