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PARTISAN REVIEW
he had his eyesight, he used to read a lot, but the only books he would
read were by Theodore Roosevelt. He had a set in each of the places
where he lived, and he brought his kids up on those books."
"Please," said Wilhelm, "don't feed me any more of this stuff, will
you? Kindly do not...."
"In telling you this," said Tamkin with one of his hypnotic subtle–
ties, "I do have a motive. I want you to see how some people free them–
selves from morbid guilt feelings and follow their instincts. Innately,
the female knows how to cripple by sickening a man with guilt. It is
a very special destruct, and she sends her curse to make a fellow
im–
potent. As if she says, 'Unless I allow it, you will never more be a man.'
But men like myoid dad or Mr. Rappaport answer, 'Woman, what are
thou to me?' You can't do that yet. You're a halfway case. You want
to follow your instinct, but you're too worried still. For instance, about
your kids...."
"Now look here," said Wilhelm stamping his feet. "One thing!
Don't bring up my boys. Just layoff."
"I was only going to say that they are better off than with con–
flicts in the home."
"I'm deprived of my children." Wilhelm bit his lip.
It
was too
late to turn away. The anguish struck him. "I pay and pay. I never
see them. They grow up without me. She makes them like herself. She'll
bring them up to be my enemies. Please let's not talk about this."
But Tamkin said, "Why do you let her make you suffer so? It defeats
the original object in leaving her. Don't play her game. Now, Wilhelm,
I'm trying to do you some good. I want to tell you, don't marry mffer–
ing. Some people do. They get married to it, and sleep and eat together,
just as husband and wife.
If
they go with joy they think it's adultery."
When Wilhelm heard this he had, in spite of himself, to admit that
there was a great deal in Tamkin's words. Yes, thought Wilhelm, suffer–
ing is the only kind of life they are sure they can have, and if they
quit suffering they're afraid they'll have nothing. He knows it. This
time the faker knows what he's talking about.
Looking at Tamkin he believed he sawall this confessed from his
usually barren face. Yes, yes, he too. One hundred falsehoods, but at
last one truth. Howling like a wolf from the city window. No one
can bear it any more. Everyone is so full of it that at last everybody must
proclaim it. It! It!
Then suddenly Wilhelm rose and said, "That's enough of this.
Tamkin, let's go back to the Market."
"I haven't finished my melon."
"Never mind that. You've had enough to eat. I want to go back."
Dr. Tamkin slid the two checks across the table. "Who paid yes-
terday? It's your turn, I think."
It was not until they were leaving the cafeteria that Wilhelm
remembered definitely that he had paid yesterday, too. But it wasn't
worth arguing about.
