DEER PARK
1i33
MARION:
My mind never stops. I'm always hearing the words of my
will. My will said to me, "You can make her kill herself." Do you
know what I thought next?
ELENA
shakes her head.
"Please not that, that's too much."
MARION
nods.
Except that what I knew was that if I couldn't do this to you, I
would never be able to do the other things.
ELENA:
(Dispiritedly-she is trying not to think of what she has done.)
What, Marion, what other things?
MARION:
I hate the queer that
is
in me, and I knew-don't ask for any
logic but love---that
if
I could make love to Eitel-yes, there was the
man to fill myself and be
in
tum a man. I was in love with Eitel after
you came along-I wanted him and I wanted you-the day you
didn't go with me, I died my little bit.
ELENA:
But I came to you. Finally I came to you.
MARION:
Too late. You have the cruelty of the slow and the stubborn.
You came to me only after you had bled the manhood from ,Eitel.
ELENA:
I didn't.
MARION:
You bled him like a leech-and now he can cure no queer
in me for he is rotten to my smell.
ELENA:
And so you kill Elena?
MARION:
You're a detail-that's all. I have hatred in me that is killing
me. Because I am too full of fear. So I have to dare ... ultimates. I
must dare to murder. I think that then I will have a power ... in–
side me ... greater than I have now. And if I am wrong, at least
I will know that too.
(puffs on the marijuana)
I used to be a Catholic
-you don't think I ignore the idea I may have to wait eternity in
a Hell of hopeless space because I give these pills to you?
ELENA :
(From the shock of his words-she speaks as if to herself.)
It
was beautiful with Charley. It was, I tell you. Charley and I had so
far to go to meet each other ... and love is beautiful at the end of
a long trip. Now I'll never feel love anymore. Oh, Charley, forgive
me, oh Charley, forgive-I'm so sick that it was more with Marion
than with you. Oh Charley, I must talk to you now.
ELENA
gets up and goes to the phone. Drugged by the pills, she
.has difficulty in dialing.
MARION
looks at her- takes a step
forward . She continues dialing-MARION goes up to her–
he puts his hand on the phone as if to take it CNlJay from her.
ELENA:
If
you stop me, you are right. Because I have brought good to
no one.
