AMONG THE ANGELIC ORDERS
219
"The ones I hear. Surely I must have told you-? Perhaps not.
Well, I'm in touch there too, they send me messages, whenever I'm
confused or uncertain, and then they come and tell me," Sheila
ex–
plained reasonably. She reached over to pick up the notebook and
turned to the back pages. "Here, look, here are their messages.
I
write them down. This is the other project
I
w.as telling you about.
Here-let me read it to you?"
Gretchen agreed.
"Um.-You know at first
I
couldn't understand. They were
try–
ing to get through to me for a long time before
I
heard them. And it
took me weeks to figure out what they were saying. Here's one–
one of the early ones. 'We will harken and hear you, having once
heard or cried to us, you will hear us. For you are selected, chosen,
you so happily-waiting one, trustingly child, dear little girl, wait
haunting, wanting you will grow, whatever happened we are here.
Be patient.'-and then they go away, sometimes in a funny way
that
I
can't understand, like they will say, 'Ally-oop' or something
silly like that."
Gretchen was all silence. Sheila turned the pages of her book and
went on: "Lately
I
begin to distinguish several voices and different
personalities. Urn-let me see-here's one that shows it.-'Wait
again, hear oh hear. Be patient. We will protect you, you will be
well, all will be well, we will save you, help you, be with you'–
and then this other voice comes in: 'Of course. I'll help you. But
you must obey. And do what
I
say. You're very wrong. Why didn't
you tell me before. I'm not sure
I
can help unless you obey.
I
know
what is best.
I
do it for your own good.'-Now, see how different
they are. One of them gentle and soft and kind, and the other sort
of protecting, and knowing everything and wanting obedience. Some–
times
they don't agree. Sometimes they give very specific directions
and sometimes
I
have to interpret it all. Or hints which sound silly
or even meaningless until
I
figure them out.
I
never know what
they'll say.
I
just wait for them to come."
After a few moments, Gretchen asked, "What does Melvin say?"
"Well, he's more interested in psychology, you know. But they
said they'd send
him
some messages. He says he'll give me
his
opinion
then."
"Doesn't he believe in it-in them?" Gretchen corrected herself.
