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some actual intellectual and literary profession- and then caught
myself and understood that a culture in which men of mind inevi–
tably went into the intellectual professions was doomed.
(1951)
Harry Levin sends me a j:>aper on The Tradition of Tradition
with the inscription "forgive the gibe"- he refers to a "sly" association
of the phrase "the liberal imagination" with conservatism or reaction:
he is ever forward. And with this paper I know that I could never go
to Harvard- for there they would take me
seriously,
with that serious–
ness of men who have no real sense of reality, but who believe they
should have. Here at Columbia I am of my own kind- if there is any
hostility and dislike there is no slightest attempt to meet me on my
own ground, at best a secret inner
flounce.
But at Harvard, nothing is
beyond a Harvard professor. I should not be allowed to make my
writing cancel their scholarship as here- they too are critics; and if
not critics then serious men who would hold me
to account
for what I
say. Here no one tries to understand except E.N.
&
I am left in
peace.
(1951)
A catbird on the woodpile, grey on grey wood, its breast distended,
the feathers ruffled and sick, a wing out of joint, the head thrown
back and the eyes rolled back, white. Looked ·so sick I thought of
killing it, when another bird appeared, looked at it, took a position
behind it, and assumed virtually the same attitude, although not so
extremely. To distract me? This it did once more, although with
rather less conviction the second time, then flew away. Suddenly
the first bird pulled itself together, flew to a tree above, sat there for
a moment seeming to adjust its wing, or exercise it, then flew away.
(1951)
When I gave my last lecture on American literature in May- a
poorish one on Henry Adams, in which I spoke chiefly in defense of
Adams- my class applauded terrifically, keeping it up after I was
out of the room, down the hall and up the first flight. They knew that
I was giving up the subject, hence this extra response. I was natur–
ally moved and gratified and even thought that perhaps I had done
wrong to give up the subject if I could so please people with my han–
dling of it- thought too that no subject I might ever treat wid ever
involve people so much
a priori,
&
that I cld never again win such
easy victories. But one reason I gave it up was the ease of the vic–
tories. And then I hated dealing with contemporary figures or nearly
