580
PARTISAN REVIEW
the central foyer and the single slow-moving elevator. On the stair–
way landing she sees her reflection in an ornamental coppery shield:
sickly-pale angular face, pinched eyes, linen jacket torn and soiled,
signs of a recent nosebleed. The sight unnerves her though it should
not be surprising.
She will deal with the situation efficiently enough: she will soak
herself in a hot bath, prepare to forget. There is a dinner that evening
at eight hosted by a German literary group and Cecilia doesn't in–
tend to miss it.
Her hotel room is on the third floor, near the rear of the
building; Philip's is close by. While she is fitting her key in the lock,
however, Philip suddenly appears-he must have been waiting for
her. He says at once in a frightened astonished voice: "What has
happened to you? Good God-"
Cecilia refuses to face him. She tells him that nothing has hap–
pened: she had an accident: she fell down a flight of stairs, five or six
steps maybe, nothing serious: nothing for him to be alarmed about.
"But Cecilia, your face, your clothes- is that
blood?
What hap–
pened?"
He touches her and she shrinks away, still not looking at him.
Now follows an odd disjointed scene in the corridor outside
Cecilia's room, which she is to recall, afterward, only in fragments.
Philip seems to know that something fairly serious has hap–
pened to her but he cannot quite think what to do, what to·say. He
keeps asking her excitedly what
exactly
happened,
~here
did she fall,
was it out on the street, were there witnesses, did anyone help her,
how badly is she hurt, should he call the downstairs desk and get a
doctor, should he call the Consulate and cancel their plans for the
evening.... Cecilia, turned away, half-sobbing, ashamed, insists
that she hasn't been injured, it was only a foolish accident, a misstep,
a fall, she banged her head and one knee, tore her jacket, her nose
started bleeding, she has only herself to blame ... won't he please
believe her?
Philip takes hold of Cecilia's shoulders but she wrenches sharply
away, ducking her head. He doesn't repeat the gesture and she
thinks,
He's afraid of me.
For some seconds they stand close together,
not touching. Each is breathing audibly.
He
should
call a doctor, Philip says hesitantly. She might have a
sprain, a concussion....
No, Cecilia insists. She
hasn't
been injured, she
isn't
upset, won't
he please let her go inside her room?
