76
PARTISAN REVIEW
and started greedily with her fingers to transfer the strawberries
from my pot to her earthenware bowl.
I looked at her-so very, very thin, a long neck, a wrinkled but
clean dress, big, grey eyes , and light brown hair. She became em–
barrassed . "Don't look at me ; I so much want strawberries . I know
you're from Riga. I'm from Tallin ... from the ballet. Like you,
since June 1941 ... a year and a month, already. Now , a clean-up
girl in the dispensary. "
"What are you in for?" I asked.
"And you?" she answered, smiling. "I am a 'socially dangerous
element,''' she added with irony , popping some unwashed strawber–
ries in her mouth.
"I've got to hurry off for my soup," I said through my teeth.
"Bring some strawberries, again. Just don't come into our bar–
racks - there's such an awful stink there . I'll wait for you at the cor–
ner." She smiled a pitiable smile and slowly trudged toward her bar–
racks pressing the bowl to her breast.
"I'll bring some more, tomorrow!" I shouted after her and
dashed off.
The next day we returned from woodcutting without strawber–
ries . The guards had not allowed us to pick any. She was waiting for
me behind the corner of the barracks.
"Don't be sorry," she said. "Here, take half of my bread . I don't
really care for it anyhow. You'll bring some berries next time . Let's
talk now for awhile. I enjoy chatting with you, for some reason ."
I took the bread . I wanted so much to eat. Suddenly, I felt
ashamed that I was so dirty, that my head was shaved, that I had
on this torn, wet, wadded jacket - it had rained that day.
"Tell me about Riga , about your life there . I've been there
many times . What's your name? Mine's Edith . I'm twenty-two."
"I'm Rudolf-Rudy," I said, and chatted on about my mother,
my sister, and my little nephew.
She listened quietly . "You must be very tired," she interrupted .
"Go and get some rest and may God be with you . Until tomorrow
"
I brought her strawberries two other times. After that there
were no more. But we continued to meet every evening. I looked for–
ward to seeing her. I kept telling her about my life . She pressed close
to me as she listened. She herself spoke very little, as though it might
be difficult for her . Once she even kissed me on the cheek.
In August it became colder with frequent rains .
