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PARTISAN REVIEW
Filbert grinned conceitedly), "was a very poor boy and is an autodi–
dact, that is to say, he gained his education at night school and in the
Library of Life and also of Knife. ' ,
This was greeted with the usual appreciation and he proceeded,
"And Morgan Jackstraw did not have the chance you children have;
hence he had to have his teeth out by the roots, when they could have
been stopped from going, but they went."
He smiled at the titter and continued, "And I who am a natural
speaker and have great natural charm, especially with the ladies; and
with any men and boys," he turned an eye on the boys, "who believe
in reason, logic, the true, the beautiful, was obliged to learn to speak
through impedimenta, the impediment ofmy ivories. They click.
You
children know that however poor the fare at home, for a man like me,
who has eaten in the company of lords and magnates," (he said,
ridiculing himself), "I prefer to eat at home, because I can click at
ease." He clicked not only at ease but demonstratively and went
through a series ofdenture acrobatics, wobbling, tossing, clicking, and
pretending to shoot his plates out on the table. "Plates to the plate,"
said he. The children greeted this with a roar of laughter, while Aunt
Mildred, rushing through the room, groaned and tossed her head. He
replaced his dentures with a lick of his agile tongue.
"Lady Wassail then asked me the name of another plant, which
incidentally was a
Hardenbergia Sydniensis.
I believe, children, that
she feels for your Uncle Morg. She told me something I could quite
agree with," he said artfully, "that she did not enjoy this banquet
anything like the last two, for she loves to see me shining at the head of
the table. 'The head is my natural element,' I said to her modestly. At
which she tittered. For your Uncle Morg," he said mournfully, looking
round the table and especially at Renee, "may not be appreciated by
Lilliputians at home; but many is the beautiful woman who has
wanted to run her long slender fingers through his golden hair. Your
Aunt Mildred may pretend to be in tantrums, but time was when she
used to sit and dream over your Uncle Morgan's golden hair."
At this grotesque idea, the children burst into laughter. Uncle
Morgan shook his head sadly,
"Tempus hefugit,"
he said.
"You
kids
have no idea how I was as a boy.
You
girls have no idea. Trixie there has
an idea; but you don't know now, with my beard getting rough, my
plate clicking, my catarrh, my digestive troubles, my appendix, my
photophobia, my antrum, my torticollis, the pain in the small of my
back, all ofwhich I fight bravely, what I was like as a boy, a young god;
