430
M AU REEN HOW A
RD
"What have I done?" the woman cried jealously, and, answer–
ing her own question, said, "I should have bred him, but I couldn't
bring myself. Give him polish, cream rinse, clip and comb."
"He was clipped last week."
"Pretend,"
said Mrs. Schlotzer, "make a buzzing. I never
should have let you people do the utility cut. From the moment the
pompoms went he's been strange."
"Yes, Mrs. Schlotzer." I hope the stones fall out of your rings.
I hope your credit cards are stolen. I hope Mr. Schlotzer is making
it with his secretary.
"He likes you -" she said gloomily - "Pick out something
for him - a rain coat. Two weeks ago I got him one of those
Italian baskets - he sits on the couch. My God -" she cried–
"what have I done?"
Hi-Marx Llewelyn walked pertly into the back room with
Jimmy Cogan and leapt up on the counter to be serviced, a quiver–
ing small beast, panting with excitement.
"That poor soul," Mimi said, popping a tranquilizer down his
tiny throat. "This is the third dog that bitch has ruined. I don't
know what she expects of them, but they feel destroyed by her,
broken."
Hi-Marx Llewelyn raised his anxious face to Jim, his delicate
muzzle dwarfed by a monstrous ruff of hair, his heart slowed to a
heavy throb as the tranquilizer set in. He pawed Jim's sweater, he
scurried around the counter, his nails clicking on the slick surface.
Poor little bastard - he was having fun. Coyly dashing at Jim he
had an erection: the pale pink crayon of his defeated masculinity.
He was brave to sit in his oily spot on the Schlotzer silk couch,
to pee and sit at the curb, not to be paraded up to the shops on
Fifth Avenue in absurd costumes and a showy ruff. Jim grabbed a
set of clippers and worked fast (the dog was so small he could
conceal him with his body) shaving Hi-Marx Llewelyn down until
he was bare as a rat. Gone the tuft at the end of his tail. Gone the
ornamental rings of fur on his spindly legs. His head unnaturally
exposed with the topknot gone was flat and narrow: otherwise he
looked the miniature of any normal self-respecting mutt. With the
dog hidden under his sweater, Jim waited for Mrs. Schlotzer to
return and wrote this note:
