354
PARTISAN REVIEW
drugs. And then, when I ran away, that's what I was running from
-really. When I came back, nothing had changed,
I
hadn't changed,
I was just-older." And he stopped, drumming with his fingers on
the windowpane. The sun had vanished, soon darkness would fall.
I watched his face. "It can come again," he said, almost as though
speaking to himself. Then he turned to me. "It can come again," he
repeated. "I just want you to know that."
"All right," I said, at last. "So it can come again, All right."
He smiled, but the smile was sorrowful. "I had to try to tell
you," he said.
"Yes," I said. "I understand that."
"You're my brother," he said, looking straight at me, and not
smiling at all.
"Yes," I repeated, "yes. I understand that."
He turned back to the window, looking out. "All that hatred
down there," he said, "all that hatred and misery and love. It's a
wonder it doesn't blow the avenue apart."
We went to the only night club on a short, dark street, down–
town. We squeezed through the narrow, chattering, jam-packed bar
to the entrance of the big room, where the bandstand was. And we
stood there for
a
moment, for the lights were very dim in this room
and we couldn't see. Then, "Hello, boy," said a voice and an enor–
mous black man, much older than Sonny or myself, erupted out
of all that atmospheric lighting and put an arm around Sonny's
shoulder. "I been sitting right here," he said, "waiting for you."
He had a big voice, too, and heads in the darkness turned toward
us.
Sonny grinned and pulled a little away, and said, "Creole, this
is my brother. I told you about him."
Creole shook my hand. "I'm glad to meet you, son," he said,
and it was clear that he was glad to meet me
there,
for Sonny's
sake. And he smiled, "You got a real musician in
your
family,"
and he took his arm from Sonny's shoulder and slapped him, lightly,
affectionately, with the back of his hand.
"Well. Now I've heard it all," said a voice behind us. This was
another musician, and a friend of Sonny's, a coal-black, cheerful–
looking man, built close to the ground. He immediately began confid-
