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PARTISAN REVIEW
of his religious convictions. Indeed it was hard for me to remember
that he was a believer, because he no more demonstrated, except in
a professional way, that crucial difference between him and me than a
lawyer can be said to indicate a highly personal sense of justice by
applying himself to his cases.
Another reason Dr. Hoffmann allowed so much of his time to be
taken up by friends was that he was by nature enormously convivial.
I became more and more conscious of
his
great need for diversion, so
conscious in fact that I underestimated the other side of him until I
heard one of his lectures.
As
a teacher he was aloof and solemn and
wonderfully impressive. His lectures, like some of the sermons he gave
me to read, were best when he was most mystical and theoretical.
Once I told his wife that I thought his real flair for literary com–
position, the beautiful, wild tone that got into the expression of his
thoughts, came from his reluctance to mention God in any specific
sense. She made no comment upon my observation and
J.
don't know
whether or not I understood him correctly. At first I accepted Dr.
Hoffmann's conviviality uncritically, until I began to notice
then~
was something wrong in his relation to his wife and daughter. When
I was the only outsider present I felt one thing quite strongly: Dr.
Hoffmann and his wife really didn't like each other. This condition
was so clear and undeniable it somehow wasn't at all dramatic. The
Hoffmanns were constantly rebuking each other, but the sarcasm
never got enough out of control to be definitely unpleasant and I
think most people thought it proved their love rather than the con–
trary. These curious and intrepid scoldings had been indulged in
for so long that I imagined they had come to accept them as the
inevitable fate of earthbound men and women. The daughter, Elsa,
was in league with the mother and whenever she was in the house
I felt an extra tension. Everything was made worse by the fact that
Dr. Hoffmann was pathetically devoted to his daughter and took
extreme pride in her.
In my own private feelings toward the Hoffmanns I did not take
sides in this unbalanced domestic situation. Dr. Hoffmann interested
me much more than his wife did, but I found her extremely likeable.
At times I thought her a bit too even-tempered and wished she had
more passion and vigor. Oddly enough she was most alive when she
was talking about her headaches and physical distress because her
intimacy with this pain seemed to give her a hold upon the world and
its evil possibilities. Yet no matter what she said or how
ill
she became,
she was essentially an ordinary woman without any sort of rebellion
