Roxbury woman in her 60s and Boston University student in her 20s forge friendship through home sharing program

There are two types of people in the kitchen, said Brenda Atchinson, a 67-year-old Roxbury woman.

There’s the “exacting type” - like her roommate Abby Herbst, 23, who takes out measuring cups and levels off the grains before pouring boiled water in her oatmeal. And then there’s Atchnison who can walk into the kitchen hungry and leave with a Thai red curry meal 30 minutes or less - no recipe necessary.

“It’s really wild,” Herbst said. “She can walk in here and say ‘Huh I’m feeling a little hungry what sort of things do I have in the fridge?’ pull out a red pepper and this and that.”

Meanwhile Herbst said, “I'm over here with the measuring cups.”

In the kitchen - and elsewhere in the Roxbury home they both occupy on Dale Street through the city’s intergenerational home sharing program - the pair developed a rhythm quickly after Herbst moved in last September.

“We’re not clashing with each other and that’s the type of choreography that can take years,” Atchinson said.

Atchinson and Herbst met on Nesterly, a platform that allows older people with spare bedrooms to rent to a younger person looking for a cheaper rent. It’s one of the ways Boston hopes to combat the housing crisis.

READ MORE: Elderly renting spare bedrooms to younger residents: It’s just one of 5 unique ways Boston plans to fix housing issues

The idea was born out of the city’s commission on aging and began with eight matches, said Marcy Ostberg, director of operations for the Department of Neighborhood Development. With Boston’s continually rising rents the city was looking for innovative ways to provide housing to residents.

“We thought ‘How could the city get involved with this solution to a dual problem?’” Ostberg said. “We have baby boomers - a fast growing population with declining income and challenges with social isolation and we have people who are rent burdened. Can we combine these two pieces into one?”

For its pilot program in 2017 the city set up eight pairs. It was so successful, Ostberg said, that the city will invest $100,000 more into the program in fiscal 2020 allowing for up to 100 matches.

Intergenerational homesharing

Abby Herbst and Brenda Atchison have been living together since September in Atchinson's home in Roxbury.

Nesterly is like a dating app, Atchinson and Herbst said. Each woman uploaded a photo and basic personal information. Then they had to answer a question: Why are you interested in home sharing?

For Herbst, living with Atchinson was a good way to save money - she takes $100 off the monthly rent in exchange for about 10 hours of work around the house. This ranges from a “major” clean up of the garden in the front yard to snow removal or other household chores.

She also craved community for the final year of her master’s program in public health at Boston University, Herbst said.

“I wanted to live in a community that was not primarily students,” Herbst said. “I have this whole idea that college campuses are fake. That everybody is exactly or pretty much around your age, we’re all studying for the same this, and all stressed about the same finals. I wanted something a little more like the real world.”

Herbst is the third student Atchinson has hosted in her home. She was part of the first home sharing cohort with the city, where she was matched with a PhD student from Greece who was working on research at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. Another student from Northeastern University who declined to be interviewed for this story lives with Herbst and Atchinson.

“One of the joys I am getting out of my experience as a home sharing host is to be I have more time to appreciate the differences amongst us that make us all very interesting quite frankly,” Atchinson said. “When you’re a younger person, you’re out in the world and you don’t have the time to sit back and appreciate the little things about people.”

Living with Atchinson has led to an unexpected friendship, Herbst said. Each enjoys hearing about the other’s plans for the day over pour over coffee around the kitchen table in the morning. They text about turkeys and raccoons in the neighborhood and dote over Atchinson’s gray cat Ruby.

Intergenerational homesharing

Abby Herbst and Brenda Atchison have been living together since September in Atchinson's home in Roxbury.

Recently, when Atchinson told Herbst she was stressed about preparing for a cooking class she leads, Herbst showed up at the community center to help her pack up her materials. Atchinson loves seeing Herbst embracing the neighborhood.

“Everytime I look up - there’s Abby doing something else,” she said.

And Herbst benefits from Atchinson support and excitement as she applies to jobs and graduates with her master’s degree.

Herbst’s job search has been as precise as her cooking, she said. She lives by a spreadsheets and sets goals of how many applications to submit per week.

“Brenda reminds me to let go a little bit,” she said. “We definitely have two completely different personalities, but she is such a great reminder right now that these are exciting changes. She’s just genuinely excited this his happening for me.”

Atchinson said the home sharing program has allowed her to be part of a person’s life for a short but meaningful time, often when they are “about to launch out into the world.”

When they leave, she hopes for a continued friendship, but if it doesn’t go beyond that “that’s OK, too.”

When Herbst graduated from Boston University in May she celebrated with a meal with family and friends.

Atchinson was at the table, smiling and cheering her on.

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