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heard such things, such things, and there I stood, the very sex maniac
Penelope had just been discussing.
"Tell," said Penelope, a little hasty, "how Professor Gold, Herbert,
the doctor here stopped you in the snow and touched your hair and
asked for your telephone number."
"Um," said Sirocco.
I was shooting truth looks into her. My mighty
I.Q.
was concen–
trated in my burning eyes. (They were burning due to a recent case of
nervous conjunctivitis.) The mad doctor (B.A., M.A., no Ph.D.) covered
her helpless body, bound head and foot by sorority bull session traditions,
with reality caresses. No Kappa Psi girl should ever be asked to undergo
such an ordeal. Poor innocent Sirocco.
"Tell, cross your heart," commanded Penelope.
"Well, I didn't say that," said Sirocco.
"What?"
"What I said, I think I said, was you had just finished telling me all
about him, the Professor, and ... and there he was, and - and he
stopped in the snow - "
"She stopped bolt and stared at me," I said.
"He
looked
at my hair as if he wanted to stroke it, and if he asked for
my telephone number I might have given it to him, because you're
my
roommate and all, and this is the most exciting thing that almost ever
happened to me, and -"
The Provost was very gentle with her. She was a customer and I was
an employee. "Thank you very much, Sirocco, that's a nice name you
have, too - "
"My mom told me there was this terrific wind storm when they . ..
and it inspired them ... and so when I came along, the blessed event,
they - "
"Thank you very much, Sirocco. You may go to your class now."
She gathered up her books, lay them aslant against her own cash-
1
mered stack, and slipped away, leaving a faint aura of Blue Grass mixed
with Rum.
As a quasi-judicial proceeding, this trial had a quasi-form. The
Provost sighed. He looked at everyone individually, dominating us with
mind and rank. The parents had the advantage over him of indignation
and money. I had the slight advantage of innocence. Penelope had ,
youth, cuteness, and psychosis going for her. All he had was the tradition
of university administration. "Is there something you would like to add,
Penelope?" he gently inquired.
"I wanted to study Humanity with him," she said. "That's what I
wanted most in life."
"Humanities," I said. "There's a difference. There's no course in
