ELIZABETH DALTON
605
cnce may orIgInate in pan in the rad icall y opposecl meanings o f
ep il epsy. Epilepsy is wltat sets Mys hkin apan from o th er men in every
way; it is weakness. illness. idi ocy. But if it is illness, it is the
morbus
sacer.
the sacred disease of shaman s and proph ets who are
lOrn
by the
rough hand o f God, who
see
through thi s rent in the fabri c of their
beings inlO ano th er worlJ. a lumino us reality free of th e limitat ions
and ambi guiti es o f o rdina ry experi ence. This mys ti ca l aspect of
Myshkin's ep il epsy is concentra ted in the aura, the momentary a ltera–
ti o n o f consciousness tha t precedes the fit , which is described in th e
fo ll owing passage:
he always had one minute just before th e epil epti c fit.. when
sudden ly in th e midst of sadness, spiritual da rkn ess and oppressio n,
th ere seemed
at
moments a fl ash of li ght in hi s brain, and with
extraordin ary impelUs a ll hi s vital fo rces suddenl y began working at
th eir hi gh est tension . T h e sense of life, th e con sciousness of self, were
multipli ed ten times at th ese momelllS, whi ch passed like a fl ash of
li ghtning. Hi s mind and hi s hean were fl ooded with extraordinary
li ght ; all his un eas in ess. all hi s doubts, all hi s anxi eti es were reli eved
a t once; th ey were all resolved into a kind of lofty calm . full of serene.
harmonious joy and hope. full of understanding and the knowledge
o f the ultima te cau se of thin gs. But th ese moments. these fl ash es,
were onl y th e prelude of th a t fin al second .. . with which th e fit
began. That second was, of course. un endura bl e.
He wonders whether thi s is on ly a mo rbid effect of hi s illness.
And yet. he came a t last to an extremely paradoxical conclusion .
'Wha t if it is disease?' h e decided a t last. 'Wh a t does it mailer tha t it is
an a bno rmal illlen sit y, if th e result , if th e minute o f sensa ti on .
remembered and analysed afterwa rds in hea lth , turns out to be th e
acme of harmon y and beauty, and gives a feeling. unknown and
undi vined till th en , of compl eten ess, of p roporti on , of reconcilia–
tion, and of ecsta ti c devoti on al merging in th e hi ghes t sYlllh es is of
life?' ... These momellls were onl y an ex traordin ary qui ckenin g of
self-consciousn ess-if th e conditi on was to be expressed in one
word-and a t th e same time of the direct sensa ti on of ex istence in the
most intense degree.
T he fea tures repea tedl y stressed in thi s account of th e a ura are the
fl as hes and fl oods o f li ght , the heightened intensity and directness of
the sens a tion of self and o f exi stence, and above a ll the ecs ta ti c sense of
harmon y in whi ch qu a liti es o f reconcilia ti on , synthes is, and merg in g
a re emphas ized. In thi s "ecsta ti c devot iona l merg ing" Myshkin , like
o thers who have had the mysti cal experi ence, feels a sudden resoluti on
