86
CHRISTINA STEAD
Christina Stead
A
NICE CAKE
Mrs. Anderson was very busy one Friday evening. She went
to bed early, scurried about in the night and had a good deal to say to
herself. When she was having her coffee at breakfast, she put her
finger on a spot of coffee and remarked:
"Wet. Those who travel understand a lot. For example, I was
told, a certain man told me, that
wet
in Dutch means law;
Wetstraat
means Law Street. Naturally, a man with a gift for languages. You're
either born with it or you're not. However, you can talk for an hour
and not say anything."
She continued disgustedly: "I prefer those who speak plain."
"Then you must speak plain and not in crossword puzzles," said
her son Gilbert, laughing.
She spat fire. "Plain! Yes, it's very suitable for a plain old
woman. I speak plainly - others do not."
Gilbert and his wife Nellie laughed. Said Mrs. Anderson:
"Very well, laugh. I know what I'm talking about."
"I know you do, but we don't," said Gilbert.
"You can judge a man by the way he treats old people.
If
a man
has respect for old people, then he is a fine man. A man who never
gives a thought to anyone but himself is either a miser or he's
greedy. He never puts his hand in his pocket! A miser! An egotist!
That's disgraceful for a young man, unmarried."
"What is the trouble, Mamma?" said Gilbert.
"Never mind, never mind," she said. She sat grieving. When
asked to have more coffee, she said: "Never mind, not for me, not
for the ald." But later she took some.
When Gilbert went shopping, he said: "Is there anything you
would like, Mamma?"
"Oh, don't trouble yourself, you're very kind," she said charm–
ingly, making her little bow. Before he had made a step, she went
up close and remarked sagely :
