68
PARTISAN REVIEW
winter night. But much of what he said, she did not really hear. It
is dark, she would be thinking, and he is beside me. Like a shadow
that she could not escape, he was beside her. And she would lead him
hastily from the bright streets where they could be seen, where she
might meet the embarrassing acquaintance, to the labyrinthine walks
of the campus and through the deserted, lonely lanes that led away
from the town, he hesitant at first, but following her, uncertain,
timorous; and she attributed his docility to--she dared not admit it,
she desired only to enjoy it as a boon to her vanity. What wiii
happen, where will it lead, she would be thinking during those walks,
and the suffocation of
his
presence was something now that she longed
for, something that seemed nourishment.
And one evening, when the winter drizzle hung in vapors on the
night, and the dark streets shone like onyx, she took his arm; and
then it became a custom for her, when they left the avenues, when
the streetlights began to cast long interspersions of blackness and
shadow, to take his arm, to draw closer to him as if for protection,
as if in friendliness.
She asked him up to her apartment.
"Would it be all right?" She could feel him frown.
"Why?" she professed innocence. "Why can't I ask you up if
I like?"
"Your landlady. Maybe she wouldn't like it. People might see
me and talk about you.... They would gossip."
"Oh !" she exclaimed. "What do I care! I've nothing to be
ashamed of. I don't care what people think."
He paused. "Are you sure?" he asked. "Are you sure there
is
nothing to be ashamed of?"
She almost blushed at the tone of his voice. "What do you
mean?" She drew away from him. "I don't understand what you
mean."
"I only mean," he repeated, "are you sure there is nothing to
be ashamed of?" He halted abruptly and looked at her. "Why?" he
asked. "Why do you want me to come up?"
She was unprepared for this question. She tried to assuage
its impact with a little laugh. "Why?...What a silly question!" she
said. "Because I consider you my friend," she continued. "Because I
ask my friends up to my place. Look," she added, "is there anything
wrong with that?"
