Delmore Schwartz
TALES FROM THE VIENNA WOODS
An Inside
Story
My father told me and he told me true
That marriage is the mystery of joy,
But other mysteries my father knew
He kept from me because I was a boy-
"If
only I had the strength of my conviction, or the con–
viction of my strength," said Tobias Simon to himself, entering the
restaurant bar where he had been once before. It was called
The
Vienna Woods,
and in back, behind the dining room, dance floor,
and bar, there was a dimly lighted cave-like room known as the
Grotto. The walls were decorated by nymphs, nude and in pursuit
of each other.
The last time he had been here, the slow warm revery which
bloomed in him as he nursed his second drink had been broken by
the loud and jubilant voice of a drunken girl departing.
"I have more fun than real people," she said boastfully, tossing
her head in an effort at gaiety and bravado. For she had been
taunted by some of the men at the bar and she had tried to answer
them by accusing them of not being able to speak English. But her
intention had been so clearly to insult them with a random accusation
that they had merely laughed at her, for they were not foreigners,
which was the meaning of the insult, and they were speaking English
to her, so that clearly she was too drunk to know how to conceive
of an effective insult.
Tobias thought of the drunken girl as he walked through the
restaurant and into the Grotto, hoping a little that she would be
there again, for he had often thought since that night of what she
had said and wondered if it were really true that she had more fun
than real people, or people who drank less than she did.
