LOVE, HAPPINESS AND ART
89
into smiles? To speak only of myself, I am grateful to Plutarch for
evenings he gave me at the lycee, evenings filled with warlike ardor,
as though the enthusiasm of whole armies were contained in my
soul.
October 3, 1846
Come, come, my mouse; stop being hurt because I speak to you
about Shakespeare instead of about myself. It's just that he seems
to me more interesting. And what should one speak about (I ask
you once more) if not about what exclusively preoccupies one's
minJ?
As
for me, I fail to understand how those people live who
are not from morning to night in an aesthetic state. I have enjoyed
more than many the pleasures of family, as much as any man of
my age the pleasures of the senses, more than many the pleasures
of love. But I don't know any delight to compare with that given me
by some of the illustrious dead, whose works I have read or seen.
The three finest things in creation are the sea,
Hamiet,
and
Mozart's
Don Giovanni.
Once again-don't be offended by all this!
For your reproach does not represent your true thoughts. It is the re–
sult of a moment of nervous irritation, and cannot dwell permanently
in
the depths of your heart.
October 7, 1846
There are sailors who discover worlds, who add new continents
to the earth and new constellations to the heavens: they are the
great masters, eternally splendid. Others belch terror from their ves–
sels'
guns and sail about waxing rich and fat from their plunder.
Still others leave home to seek gold and silk under foreign skies, and
still others merely let down their nets to catch salmon for epicures
and
cod for the poor. I am the obscure and patient pearl-fisher, who
returns from his dive empty-handed and blue in the face. Some
fatal attraction draws me down into the depths of thought, down
into those innermost recesses which never lose their fascination for
the strong of heart. I shall spend my life gazing at the Ocean of Art,
while on it others navigate or do battle; and from time to time I
shall entertain myself by plunging to the bottom in search of bright–
hued shells that no one will want. I shall keep them for myself alone,
and
use them to cover the walls of my hut.
