LOVE, HAPPINESS AND ART
101
thing has its limit, and I am a big enough boy now to consider my
training completed. I have other things to think about. I was born
)
with
all
the vices. I completely suppressed many of them, and have
indulged the rest but slightly. God alone knows the martyrdom I
suffered during that psychological breaking-in; but I have finished
with it. That is the way of death, and I want to remain alive for
three or four more books; therefore I am set, immovable. You say
I
am
made of granite. Yes, my feelings are of granite. But if my
heart is hard it is at least sturdy, and never gives way. Betrayals and
unjust accusations will not change what is engraved on it. Every–
thing will remain, and the thought of you, whatever you do or I
do, will not be effaced.
Adieu, a long kiss . . .
