Elisabeth Donnelly
Vigilante Squirrel Justice

Me and my sister were driving
down to New Orleans.
On an empty highway in Alabama
downing chocolate covered espresso beans.

My sister was starting to speed,
I made sure to point that out.
We spied a truck with cages of squirrels
on Route 51, headin' south.

We with our liberal sensibilities,
made a sneaky surreptitious decisions.
We'd drive that truck right off the road
and make a big ol' collision!

Our car was pushing eighty,
and we snuck up behind the fender.
Then we sideswiped the side of the truck,
it spun 'round and 'round like a blender.

The driver of the truck was livid!
And he scampered into the woods.
While we let the squirrels out to roam free,
and they thanked us as best they could.

<< Back to Issue 3, 2000