Now G-d said to Noah “I don’t want no sinning!”
I’ve been telling you this since in the beginning
You’ve gotta round up your sons and all of their women
Because you’re going on a big boat ride
Now gather all the animals by the pair
Build a big ship about a million square
And put all the animals right in there
And sail away on the tide
But what if Noah had just said no suh?
Well we’d all have fins and scaly skins
We’d breath through gills instead of nostrils
And we’d eat fish food ‘stead of vitamin pills
It’s scary but it’s true
So do what the good book
Do what the good book
Do what the good book tells you to
Now G-d said to David “Do you hear that drumming?”
You’ve got a great big Philistine army coming!
You want to oil up your sling and really get it humming
Because you’ve gotta take the big guy down
Well David he got a dose of frights
But he wanted to be king of the Israelites
So he put ol’ Goliath right in his sights
And he bounced one off of his crown
But what if David had whined and wavered?
We’d live like slaves to Philistine knaves
Our bosses would all be thirty feet tall
We’d wash their clothes with a fire hose
And we’d sleep in the cracks between their toes
It’s scary but it’s true
And if I were you
I’d do what the good book
Do what the good book
Do what the good book tells me to
