PDF

Daisy Moraa Ong'angi
Love After Love

1. Faces (I)

In my crowd of faces
It's not yours I see
But many other faces;

I loved you first in waves of longing
Then as a mirage in the many faces I met
Then as a fantasy when we first met

Then when you were right before me, as the dawn of man
Then when beside me, as a man
Still, when beside me, as my man

Now that you are not here, but still here
(can't you see? You are still here
Worlds away, but still here) –

I have loved you first as a wound
Then as haunting memory, fading memory
And now, simply as a ghost

But I know,
I know
I know I will find you engraved in another face

 

2. Faces (II)

I thought that your face had receded into oblivion
But you are – you are my very face;
Your eyes are mine
Your heart is mine

And your sins
And your laughter
And that stupidity you fling around at times
Are also mine.

 

3. Why We Fought, Still Fight

Not satisfied.
Never satisfied.

I am not satisfied.
I am never satisfied.

You are not satisfied. You are never satisfied.

Evidence: that insatiable hunger gnawing at the edge of your soul.
Plan: consume time to pacify the hunger by pouring ourselves into life.

Evidence: those unforgettable darting restless eyes mirroring your soul.
Plan: walk where the restless wind leads, that's life.

 

4. What Do You Know About Love?

But who taught you that love is what you think it is?
With or without you,
With or without your permission
Love just is.

Love has no name or form except love—
Fugitive, it cannot be contained.
Infinite, it cannot be exhausted.
Eternal, it cannot be timed.

 

5. Finding Love Again

Reality supersedes imagination –

There's a movement

A new movement
Where I expected none
Exactly where I expected none

Why hope exists—

There's a movement

A new movement
Where I expected none
Exactly where I expected none

He will turn your mourning into joy—

There's a movement
A new movement
Where I expected none
Exactly where I expected none

A wordless prayer answered; a promise fulfilled—

There's a movement
A new movement
Where I expected none
Exactly where I expected none

After all this time, freedom—

There's a movement
A new movement
Where I expected none
Exactly where I expected none

After all that suffering, a smile—

There's a movement
A new movement
Where I expected none
Exactly where I expected none

After all this time, a beating heart –

There's a movement
A new movement
Where I expected none
Exactly where I expected none

Despite it all, despite it all—

There's a movement
A new movement
Where I expected none
Exactly where I expected none

--

Daisy Moraa is a poet, and both an amateur essayist and photographer. She is almost a graduate civil engineer and she lives and studies in Nairobi, Kenya. On her Twitter she's doing an impromptu 2016 literary project dubbed Public Catalogue of Private Thoughts. Her blog can be found at www.simplymoraa.com

<< Back to New Writing from Africa
<< Back to Issue 19, 2016

 
 
 
Published by Pen and Anvil Press
 

 

ISSN 2150-6795
Clarion Magazine © 1998-present by BU BookLab and Pen & Anvil Press